Heather Gilmer's Blogs

Well, my twenties have come to an end, and it’s still crazy to believe a week later. Embarking into my thirties, one of my goals is to do more writing. I was encouraged several times before to start a blog, and I’m finally doing it! So in honor of my first official post, here’s a reflection of some of the most valuable lessons the last decade taught me:

1. Don’t Compare Your Journey to Others.

Your twenties are a prime time when you’ll witness several of your former high school classmates start their careers, buy their first homes, get married, and have children. Because of this, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind if you haven’t accomplished as much as them. But that’s far from the truth. Everyone goes through life at their own pace, so trust in God’s timing. You may not have it all figured out yet, and that’s okay! You’re exactly where you’re meant to be.

2. Relationships Require Effort.

Unlike most people, I didn’t enter the dating world until my mid-twenties. During this time, I had to do a lot of self-reflection to recognize the things I want out of a relationship and the things I shouldn’t tolerate. In doing so, I quickly learned the value of pure and equal effort. When two people care enough to make their relationship last, they’ll make it last without excuses, through the ups and downs. Never settle for something that isn’t being reciprocated (this goes for friendships, too!)

3. Prioritize Your Mental Health.

When you have a heart that genuinely cares for others the way mine does, it’s easy to go the extra mile to support their well-being without giving a single thought to your own. Finding the courage to admit you’re struggling can be tough, but it’s the first step toward improving your mental health. In my twenties, I battled through a lot of anxiety and depression. It’s the time I learned to take control over my mental health by setting boundaries and reaching out for help when needed. It’s also crucial to maintain a positive outlook, get enough rest and nutrition, and do things you enjoy. Remember, it’s okay to not always be okay. You will eventually find your happiness again.

4. Fear is the Enemy of Success.

It’s amazing to look back at this last decade and ponder everything I used to be terrified of doing but have since overcome. Online dating, leading a team, even getting my cochlear implant. If I had spent another decade terrified of those things, I wouldn’t have met my boyfriend, gained professional skills, or been able to hear clear speech in an ear that hasn’t heard it in ages!  This is why it’s so important to try new things even if you’re scared and get comfortable with being uncomfortable. It forces you to achieve the things you never thought were possible!

5. Embrace Every Moment.

A year is 365 days; a decade is 3,650 days. To anyone looking at those numbers, the time seems so far away. In reality, it goes by much too quickly, so don’t take any of it for granted. The good, the bad. Every achievement, every heartbreak, every experience, and every lesson. It’s all part of the process of creating a wiser, stronger, better version of myself. And for that, I am incredibly grateful for what these last ten years have taught me. Looking forward to growing more in this next chapter!